Selasa, 15 November 2011

UGLY cat

Everyone in the apartment complex I lived in knew who Ugly was. Ugly was the resident tomcat.
Ugly loved three things in this world: fighting, eating garbage, and shall we say, love. The combination of these things combined with a life spent outside had their effect on Ugly.
To start with, he had only one eye, and where the other should have been was a gaping hole. He was also missing his ear on the same side, his left foot has appeared to have been badly broken at one time, and had healed at an unnatural angle, making him look like he was always turning the corner. His tail has long since been lost, leaving only the smallest stub, which he would constantly jerk and twitch. Ugly would have been a dark gray tabby striped-type, except for the sores covering his head, neck, even his shoulders with thick, yellowing scabs.
Every time someone saw Ugly there was the same reaction. “That’s one UGLY cat!!”
All the children were warned not to touch him, the adults threw rocks at him, hosed him down, squirted him when he tried to come in their homes, or shut his paws in the door when he would not leave.
Ugly always had the same reaction. If you turned the hose on him, he would stand there, getting soaked until you gave up and quit. If you threw things at him, he would curl his lanky body around feet in forgiveness. Whenever he spied children, he would come running meowing frantically and bump his head against their hands, begging for their love. If you ever picked him up he would immediately begin suckling on your shirt, earrings, whatever he could find.
One day Ugly shared his love with the neighbors huskies. They did not respond kindly, and Ugly was badly mauled. From my apartment I could hear his screams, and I tried to rush to his aid. By the time I got to where he was laying, it was apparent Ugly’s sad life was almost at an end.
Ugly lay in a wet circle, his back legs and lower back twisted grossly out of shape, a gaping tear in the white strip of fur that ran down his front. As I picked him up and tried to carry him home I could hear him wheezing and gasping, and could feel him struggling. I must be hurting him terribly I thought.
Then I felt a familiar tugging, sucking sensation on my ear - Ugly, in so much pain, suffering and obviously dying was trying to suckle my ear. I pulled him closer to me, and he bumped the palm of my hand with his head, then he turned his one golden eye towards me, and I could hear the distinct sound of purring. Even in the greatest pain, that ugly battled-scarred cat was asking only for a little affection, perhaps some compassion.
At that moment I thought Ugly was the most beautiful, loving creature I had ever seen. Never once did he try to bite or scratch me, or even try to get away from me, or struggle in any way. Ugly just looked up at me completely trusting in me to relieve his pain.
Ugly died in my arms before I could get inside, but I sat and held him for a long time afterwards, thinking about how one scarred, deformed little stray could so alter my opinion about what it means to have true pureness of spirit, to love so totally and truly. Ugly taught me more about giving and compassion than a thousand books, lectures, or talk show specials ever could, and for that I will always be thankful. He had been scarred on the outside, but I was scarred on the inside, and it was time for me to move on and learn to love truly and deeply. To give my total to those I cared for.


Many people want to be richer, more successful, well liked, beautiful, but for me, I will always try to be Ugly.

Rabu, 02 November 2011

GORESAN TERCINTA UNTUK AYAH DAN IBU

Saat kutengadahkan wajahku ke atas menatap terik mentari,
Saat kutatap gemerlap bintang di kala gelap yang siap mengantarkan mimpi, Tergores sepasang nama,
Nama yang selalu kuingat dalam benak diri,

Saat kupalingkan mukaku ke bawah menatap dinding & lantai,
Tetap tergores sepasang nama,
Nama yang selalu kukenang hingga akhir hayat diri,

Saat kulalui hari-hari berganti,
Tetap selalu tergores,
Tetap terukir dalam sanubari ini, Tetap tertata, tersusun dengan indah,
Sepasang nama yang akan selalu kuteladani,

Sepasang nama,
Nama… yang selalu rela berkorban untukku,
Berkorban hingga akhir hayat mereka,
Yang selalu merelakan & mengiklaskan hidupnya,

Untuk diriku,
Untuk kebahagianku,
Untuk membimbingku,
Untuk menempah diriku,
Menjadi seorang MANUSIA,
Kepala ini tertunduk,
Mata ini sembab,
Lidah ini keluh,
Hati ini pilu,

Saat kukenang,
Saat-saat indah bersamanya, Ketika dekap erat penuh kasih,
Membelenggu seluruh jiwa,
Dalam hening pikiranku,
Kutatap raut mukanya yang sudah keriput,
Kuingat tatap bola mata yang mulai pudar,
Kurasakan tetes deras keringatnya,
Kulukis putih rambut yang menipis & beruban,

Semua itu,
Untuk menafkahi kehidupan kami,

Meskipun dalam berat hari-harimu,
Terkadang muncul amarah mereka buatku,
Tapi ku tahu amarahnya adalah bagian kasihnya untukku,
Marahnya adalah cintanya untukku,

Tuhan,
Sampaikan rasa rindu ini buat mereka,
Sampaikan goresan kata dariku buat mereka,
Sampaikan jika aku selalu mengingat mereka, Sampaikan kalau aku selalu mendambakan kehadiran mereka,

Meskipun terkadang,
Aku lalai, aku lupa,
Aku terlalu sibuk untuk urusanku sendiri,
Hingga terkadang waktu 24 jam tidak cukup kusisakan buat mereka,

Tuhan,
Sampaikan goresan kata ini untuk mereka,
Rasa terima kasih yang mendalam,
Rasa bakti yang mendalam,
Atas semua perhatian mereka,
Atas kasih sayang mereka,
Atas do’a-do’a mereka,
Atas semua pengorbanan mereka,

Untuk semua kesuksesan diriku,
Karena aku, terkadang lalai untuk berbagi dengan mereka,
Aku terkadang terlena dengan kesenangan juga kesuksesan diri,

Tuhan,
Bahagiakan mereka,
Dalam setiap tetes air mata bahagia yang mereka jatuhkan,
Dalam setiap pengabdian & ibadah yang mereka lakukan,
Untuk-MU Yang Maha Segalanya !